Bridges - A Collection
by Shimy
Summary: A collection of one-shots or two-shots. Stories will probably range from K to T. Second one-shot: Catharsis. Takes place some time after ep. 7x23 (Hollander's Woods). Kate joins Castle to tell him about her decision.
1. Syndrome

**Author's note: Hey everyone! Hope you're all fine and had a good time watching episode 7x06! :-) Obviously, it made my own creative juices flow and I had a lot of fun writing this. It was supposed to be a really short story - maybe one page or two - and then it took on a life of its own and had me write about 5 pages more. The title "Bridges" is, I think, completely due to the fact that I was listening to the song "The Bridge - A Lover's Apology" (by the Brobdingnagian Bards - hope I spelled that right) when I started writing and it made me think about Caskett so there you go.**

**Also, bridges create connections. I think I'm going to use this as a collection of one-shots, so if you have requests (rating from K to T), please feel free to send me a private message - wouldn't want to ruin the surprise for other people - to tell me about them. However, be warned : I write when I feel like writing and when I've got the time for it and being a non-native speaker, writing in English takes more time than it would in French.**

**That being said, I really hope you enjoy your reading and if you have the time , hit that review button and let me know what you thought. Constructive criticism is always welcome. :-) **

**And I don't own _Castle_. Never did, never will, except for my DVDs.  
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><p><strong><span>BRIDGES<span>**

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><p><strong>01 - Syndrome ~ Takes place at some point in the future. Just because I stumbled upon an article that lit up the figurative lightbulb. Pure fluff and fun.<strong>

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><p>Kate was not awake yet, but she definitely was not sleeping soundly anymore either. Opening her heavy eyelids seemed an impossible task to accomplish and she unhappily frowned at whatever had disturbed the peaceful slumber she had fallen into a couple of hours ago. It was still the dead of night. In a familiar, almost instinctive gesture now, she turned round on herself to reach over to her husband's side and a most displeased – yet entirely heartfelt – groan made it past her lips when her hand could not find anything but stupid air and empty sheets.<p>

"Castle?" she sleepily slurred, but got no answer in return.

Since she could not put if off any longer, Kate slowly opened her eyes and let them adjust to the relative darkness of the room. Looking at the place where her husband should have been, she patted the mattress, feeling the still warm sheets beneath her fingers. Her brow furrowed - he could not have been gone for long, and the chances of him currently writing in his office were practically nonexistent since he had completed five chapters in a row the day before. Plus, she could not hear the familiar and comforting noise of his fingers flying over his keyboard, so a sudden bout of inspiration was certainly not to blame for Castle's lack of presence at her side.

And then she heard him through the unusually closed door of the en-suite bathroom.

_Oh, no. Not again._

Sleep now completely and utterly forgotten, she rose from the bed and made her way to the bathroom, opening the door with as little noise as she could manage. Sure enough, Castle was there, wearing nothing but his boxers and kneeling on the cold floor while he emptied the contents of his stomach into the toilet bowl. Fighting the urge to throw up herself when the horrid smell hit her nose, Kate forced herself to breathe through her mouth only while she walked over to her husband and crouched down to his level, setting one of her palms over his right shoulder-blade.

He startled a little bit and she mentally cursed herself.

"Kate. I didn't – he tried to speak but apparently his stomach had other plans and he once again retched. "Shit."

"Well, I'm no doctor but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't come from there" she quipped, hoping to lighten the situation, however awful the joke.

He let out what she supposed what the closest thing to a chuckle he could manage at the moment and that made her smile while she kept stroking his broad back in soothing motions, watching attentively as he closed his eyes for a moment in an attempt to calm himself down. He eventually nodded and rose up on slightly wobbly legs, walking over to the sink and mechanically reaching for his toothbrush and toothpaste. In the meantime, she flushed the toilet and sat down on the side of the tub, watching his face carefully in the mirror and pondering what she should say and _how_. She settled for blunt and truthful.

"Castle. This has to stop."

He groaned and gestured to his mouth full of toothpaste, indicating he could not reply but the slight roll of his eyes – and had he picked that particular habit from her? – did not escape her attention.

"No, I'm serious. You can't keep going on like this. You've been having severe headaches and stomach aches for almost three weeks now. Not to mention the eighteen times I've seen you throwing up in here and yes, I've been counting."

His blue eyes met hers in the mirror and he sighed heavily, his shoulders slumping before he bent over and rinsed his mouth. He otherwise made no response to her comment so she waited until he was done.

"Kate, we've been over this. I feel fine."

She could not help the way she scoffed. "Yeah, obviously."

Standing up again, she took deliberately slow steps towards him and, once she was close enough, snaked her arms around his bare waist and made him turn round so she could step into his embrace.

"Rick, please. We both know this isn't normal. You've got to make an appointment with your doctor and see what's wrong with you."

"But, Kate –

"No. Not buts. You say you feel fine but you clearly don't so stop claiming that you do."

"Look, how about we wait another couple of days and then –

But Castle never got to finish what he was about to suggest since his wife had risen on her toes and crashed her mouth to his for a searing kiss that made everything else appear decidedly dull and uninteresting. When they parted for air, Kate kept her hands on Castle's cheeks to make sure he was looking straight at her as she went for the final blow.

"No. I don't want to see you like this any longer, especially if I have no explanation for it. I love you and I'm worried about you."

He slightly flinched and she knew she'd won. _Gotcha_.

"That's – You know I can't resist you when you say these kind of things."

"Which is exactly why I'm saying them" Kate replied with an easy smile forming on her face.

"Not fair, Mrs. Castle. Not fair at all."

She grinned widely and pecked his lips once more. "All's fair in love and war, babe. Now tell me, what are you going to do?"

"Go back to sleep with my wife."

"Good, but not good enough."

"And call Doctor Harris in the morning to make an appointment."

"Excellent. Now come to bed with me. I wanna make out."

He laughed loudly as she gave him that cheeky smile he loved so much, the one where the tip of her tongue took a sneak peek between her teeth and made sure he would follow her wherever she went. Not that he needed the incentive anyway, but it certainly was an added bonus and who was he to complain about it?

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><p>He should have complained about it. He <em>definitely <em>should have complained about it.

He hated this. Would give anything to be anywhere but where he was. Sure, Doctor David Harris had become somewhat of a friend of his over the years they had known one another, but he still loathed it when he had to undress in front of him and have him palpate his body to search for whatever was wrong with him. It was not that it made him feel uncomfortable per se – well, maybe it did a little bit, because it certainly did not make him feel _comfortable_ – and he understood the medical need for it but he did not like it. Never had, never would.

Kate, however, had been quite glad when she'd found out, about two years ago, that his doctor was a man. That particular memory brought a cheerful smile onto his face and Doctor Harris immediately noticed it.

"What's so funny?"

"I was just thinking about how _relieved_ my wife seemed to be when I told her you weren't a woman."

"Ah, I see" the doctor replied with a wry smile of his own. "Did she come here with you?"

"No. She's at home, though. She's just on call today so as long as there's no murder, she can stay with me."

Doctor Harris made a humming sound in reply as he kept applying precise pressure on different parts of Castle's lower chest to see whether his patient was feeling any pain in particular areas. Apparently, it wasn't the case. Out of habit, he still took his tensiometer and put it around Castle's arm, pumping with practiced ease.

"Alright, Rick. Your breathing, pulse and blood pressure are very good so whatever you're suffering from can't be too bad. When exactly did those headaches and stomach aches of yours start?"

"About three weeks ago."

"Have you changed anything about your eating habits recently?"

"No, not at all."

"And you say they can happen at any time of day or night?"

"Yeah. The headaches are worse, really. The stomach aches – they just come and go – like bad cramps, you know? And I'm sick of throwing up. "

"You've made better puns before."

Castle replayed his words in his head and only then realized the play on words he'd not even meant to do. "Geez, that was awful."

"Now you're being too hard on yourself. Anyway, I think we're all done here. Put your shirt back on and then we'll talk some more."

Castle did as he was told without asking any further questions while Doctor Harris sat down at his desk and began typing something on his computer. Once his task was completed, the writer took a seat of his own and waited patiently until the other man was ready. Doctor Harris quickly finished whatever he was typing and bent slightly over the dark wood of the desk, joining his hands together.

"I hope you understand that I don't mean to pry but has everything been fine with your wife?"

Castle's eyes widened with incomprehension. He clearly did not understand what this might have to do with any of his recent physical problems. "What do you mean?"

"Well, headaches and stomach aches can be a physical indication of some underlying psychological unease and/or issues. So I'm asking you again, has everything been fine with your wife?"

"Well…yeah. There's hasn't been any kind of trouble between us."

"Not even physically?"

"I'm sorry, what?"

"Sexually speaking, have you had any problems to, well, _satisfy_ her?"

Castle could not help the shriek of indignation he let out at that, almost wanting to punch Harris for what he'd been implying but then remembered the doctor was not judging him – besides, as far as he was concerned, he could _judge away_ – but merely trying to figure out what was going on with him. He relaxed his posture and let a rather proud grin stretch his lips.

"Nope. As a matter of fact, things have been…_especially_ good in that area."

Doctor Harris nodded and duly noted the emphasis the writer had used on the adverb. "Better than usual, then?"

Okay. Now Castle _really_ wanted to punch him.

"What?! No! It's always been…amazing between us. It's just become a more…frequent occurrence. Not that it wasn't before, I mean, but – _hormones_, you know?"

There was a moment of silence that followed Castle's statement, and in that moment understanding clearly dawned on the doctor's face. Still, he had to make sure.

"Are you saying that your wife is pregnant?"

The instant delight that painted itself on the writer's face upon hearing those words was all the confirmation Harris needed and he burst out laughing. Of course that would be it. Why hadn't he thought about it sooner? It made perfect sense. Castle, however, lost his smile and seemed a bit confused by his doctor's sudden hilarity. The latter took pity on him and smiled reassuringly.

"I think I know what's going on and to be honest, I'm surprised you haven't figured it out yourself."

He paused for dramatic effect – it was nothing serious after all – and then dropped the figurative yet harmless bomb.

"Have you ever heard about what we call the Couvade Syndrome?"

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><p>As soon as she heard the sound of the key turning in the lock of the door, Kate forgot about her comfortable spot on the couch where she'd been re-reading <em>Heat Wave<em> for the past hour and a half – thank goodness for not having been called in yet – and jumped to her feet, making a beeline for the entrance of the loft. The door slowly opened and her husband walked over the threshold with none of his usual cheerfulness – a fact that made a brand new wave of nervousness crash ruthlessly against the shores of her heart.

"Hey, babe" she greeted him with a smile she was surprised she could manage. And when he didn't smile back at her, it disappeared. "Oh, God. Is it serious? What did Doctor Harris say?"

He didn't answer straight away, simply looked at her and took her hand in his own to lead her back to the couch where they sat down side by side while he seemed to ponder over the words he should use. He settled for blunt and truthful.

"He said it's because of you."

Kate gasped in silent horror, staring at him with fearful, worried eyes. It took her a little while for the weight of his words to settle and he waited in silence. She felt tears clogging up her throat but she still found the strength to whisper the question that was hammering her mind.

"What did I do? Castle, what did I do?"

"You didn't do anything."

"Castle, _please_. Just tell me. I'll do whatever it takes to make it better, I promise."

And then he stared at her and happy crinkles appeared at the corner of his eyes and his lips started to shake in mirth and he laughed – actually _laughed_ – and she suddenly understood he'd been playing her all along.

"You idiot! How could you do that? I was worried sick!"

She slapped him on his shoulder for good measure, which only served to increase his laughter and then she felt so relieved that whatever he was suffering from did not seem serious enough to worry him that she could not help but laugh along with him.

It took them a couple of minutes and several kisses to calm down. When they did, however, Kate scooted closer to sit on Castle's lap and wound her arms around his neck.

"So…What's really going on?"

He grinned again.

"What I said before was true. It _is_ because of you. However," he added as an afterthought while he settled one of his palms over her navel, "It's not because of you _alone._"

She glanced down at where his hand was and then back up at his eyes, ever so blue and filled with warmth and love.

"You mean…this has something to do with our baby?"

God, he loved the ease with which she referred to this little being as being theirs. Nodding his head in confirmation, his grin got impossibly wider.

"You've been suffering from typical pregnancy symptoms yourself. You know," he added, counting on his fingers to make his point clear by enumerating said symptoms, "morning sickness, stomach aches, headaches, back aches, mood swings, cravings –

"Geez, thanks for reminding me what I signed up for."

"Sorry."

"Apology accepted. Now, you were saying?"

"Well, what _I_ am suffering from is actually very similar to what _you_ are suffering from. Almost identical, actually. Doctor Harris called it the Couvade Syndrome a.k.a. 'sympathetic pregnancy'. Apparently, my subconscious is feeling so bad about you having to endure these downsides of pregnancy that it has decided to, uh, sign me up for the ride, so to speak."

It was Kate's turn to burst into laughter.

"Oh my God, Castle, that is so _cute_!"

"First time I've ever heard someone say that throwing up was cute."

"You know what I mean."

"Yes, I do."

"Nuptial humor still, huh? You're such a sap."

"You love it."

"Yes, I do, Mr. Castle."

Kate was sure they were both grinning like loons and that if Esposito were to see them right now, he would fake gagging at the goo-goo eyes they were making at each other. She could not care less as her husband leaned in to kiss her again. When they separated, she was still chuckling at the idea that Castle was empathetic enough to make himself go through these effects of pregnancy with her. She also felt a stupid surge of pride and possessiveness when she realized this could not have happened with Meredith or he would have known what was going on.

The idea was pleasant enough to make her want to re-attach her lips with his, but then of course he had to speak.

"You know what?"

"What?"

"It's like I'm making it obvious that we share a strong mental connection!"

"Really, Castle? Are you picturing us as a couple of Na'vi right now?"

"Ooh, an _Avatar _reference. I approve. For the record, you'd look stunning in blue."

"I think I made that kind of remark some time ago when I suggested you mutating into Dr. Manhattan and you didn't seem so thrilled about it."

"I'll have you know that Na'vi are much sexier than Dr. Manhattan."

"Because they have queues?"

"No, because they can form _Tsaheylu_ with their queues and share a neural connection, feel every single thing their partner is feeling!"

"Hmm, I guess you're right. If we were Na'vi, it'd be nice to make _Tsaheylu _when I go into labor and share the pain with you."

The way her husband suddenly blanched made Kate howl with laughter at the expression on his face.

"What is it, Castle? I thought you wanted us to share everything?"

"I do! But unfortunately we're not Na'vi, so…"

She snorted again. "Lucky you."

"Hey, I think I just proved I was willing to suffer with you. Sympathetic pregnancy, remember?"

Kate shook her head but her smile never left her face. She never thought it would be possible to love him even more but he proved her wrong every single day.

"Alright, hot shot. I expect you to be right by my side on D-Day so I can break your hand. All twenty-seven bones."

"Mrs. Castle, you've got yourself a deal."


	2. Catharsis

**Author's note: Nope, still don't own _Castle_.  
>Also, I'm quite sad to learn that Captain Gates won't be returning in Season 8.<strong>

That being said, I hope you enjoy your reading. :-)

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><p><strong>02 - Catharsis (from the Greek κάθαρσις katharsis meaning "purification" or "cleansing")<strong>

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><p>She found him in Central Park, not too far away from a pair of swings that were currently occupied by happy children. He was sitting cross-legged on the vibrant green grass, alternatively staring ahead of him and closing his eyes to inhale the soft, warm breeze that was blowing through the trees. He looked, for lack of a better word, positively tranquil.<br>She smiled to herself and made her way to her husband.

He was so deep in thought that he did not even realize she was suddenly standing next to him. She brushed the tips of her fingers against his cheek, gently calling his name to avoid startling him.  
>It did not work, of course, and he jumped a little at the unexpected touch before his eyes landed on her face and he relaxed again.<p>

He checked his watch and was surprised when it read five p.m. "You're early," was the first thing he told her and she could not help the chuckle that escaped her throat.

"I'm very sorry for the inconvenience, Mr. Castle," she replied, mirth and gentle sarcasm lacing her words as she combed her fingers through his hair, "I can come back later if that's what you want."

He rapidly shook his head no and pulled on her unoccupied hand to make her sit beside him. She pretended to think about it for a second and then complied by moving in a soft, pliant way to pull herself flush against his side.

Craning his neck to get to her lips, he gave her a quick, chaste kiss that did not deter her from humming against his mouth.

A couple of minutes stretched away before either of them spoke, content as they were to just be together. Eventually, though, he could not bear the suspense any longer and wanted to know what decision she had made.

"What's it going to be, Kate?"

She laced her fingers through his own and gave his hand a small squeeze. "I am not going to run for New-York State Senate."

He nodded in acceptance and then prompted her to tell him more. "Why?"

"Honestly, can you really picture me as a politician?"

"I can picture you as pretty much anything you put your mind into being."

"I'm trying to be serious here, Castle."

"So am I," he exclaimed indignantly, which prompted her lips to curl into a small smile before they turned down again and she gave a sigh, her shoulders slightly hunched.

"Castle, when you were in that D.C. hospital after the toxin incident, McCord told me that if I wanted to keep my job within the federal force, I had to stop seeing the world in black and white. She said I should learn to accept the innumerable shades of grey the politic world was made of. And in the end, I was fired from the F.B.I. because I refused to let an innocent woman basically jump into a deathtrap."

"Which was one of the noblest things you've ever done, in my opinion."

"You're sweet, and thank you," she acknowledged before rewarding him with a peck on his jawline, "but that's not the point. The point is, I don't want to become one of those people who enter politics with a great ideal in their mind and then get either crushed by the political machine for refusing to oil it the right way, or end up just like all the others who forgot about what their goal was in the first place."

He remained silent for a little while, looking at her in that adoring way that always made a flush creep up her cheeks.

"Castle, I don't want to become one of them. I don't want to make compromises with people I loathe and then wake up one day and realize I lost myself in that dirty world because I played by its rules and not by my own."

"You know," he interjected with a faraway look in his eyes, "that reminds me of something my mother used to tell me when I was a kid."

"Really?"

"Yep."

She used her elbow to poke him in the ribs for that. "Well, are you going to tell me or not?"

He smiled at her curiosity and began his story.

"I was twelve years old, almost thirteen if I remember correctly. I'd been bullied by other kids in school for a good part of my life but I had learnt how to defend myself by using words and humor. Well-placed sarcasm became my armor and my coping mechanism. It took a little while but bullies eventually stopped targeting me because they knew I had the means to ridicule them."

Kate watched attentively as her partner's expression sobered and his eyes darkened with an emotion she could not quite put her finger on.

"Of course, just because I was now strong enough to confront those kids on my own did not mean they were going to change their ways. Since I was no longer receptive to their threats, they just picked another victim. Another boy, called Neil Archer, who had never hurt anyone and whom I chose not to help."

"But-

"In my head, at that moment, I was telling myself that no one had ever given a damn about me so why should I have spared that boy a second thought? I didn't know him and if I had been able to build myself my own armor, then he was going to have to learn how to do the same."

Castle marked a pause to take a breath before continuing. "When I went home that night and told my mother about Neil, she remained silent and stared at me like she could not believe what she'd just heard. Then she rose from the table and she told me she was very disappointed with me, that she was so very _ashamed _of me and that, worst of all, she did not understand how I could not feel ashamed of _myself_."

The writer let out a humorless chuckle at that. "My mother seized my wrist and, without uttering a single word, dragged me in our teeny-tiny bathroom until I was standing in front of the mirror which, by the way, was cracked. I met her eyes in the mirror, and they were so stern, Kate, so full of _righteous_ anger that I knew I'd really messed up. Then she gave me one of the most important life lessons ever. She told me, '_Richard, how could you let someone else go through what you went through without acting about it? How can you bear the thought of having deliberately let someone suffer when you could have helped that person?'_

"I remember I bowed my head and started to cry but she wouldn't let me. She lifted my chin and did not let go, made me stare at my reflection again. _'Look! Look at yourself, Richard, and tell me again how relieved you are that Neil Archer is now suffering instead of you! I dare you to tell me again!'"_

Kate was listening to her husband with rapt attention as he recounted this key-moment of his teenage years and her admiration for Martha was sky-rocketing by the second.

"Of course, I could not repeat my words because I had understood the full extent of what I'd done, or rather what I'd _not_ done, out of pure selfishness. I could not even bear to look at myself in the mirror anymore – I was desperate to look away and that time, as I quite literally burst into tears, my mother let me. She hugged me, soothed me as I repeatedly told her how sorry I was, as I begged her to forgive me over and over again."

"She ultimately told me it was okay, that I'd made a mistake but that I could start working on fixing it the day after. She said to me, _'Just promise me now, darling, that you will never turn a blind eye ever again. Nothing, you hear me, nothing is more important than being at peace with yourself. At the end of every single day of your life, before you go to bed, I want you to be able to look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself that you're not ashamed of whatever it is you've done during the day.'_"

A rather long moment went by before either of them spoke again, but their laced fingers never separated. Castle needed the time to breathe while Beckett used it to fully digest the story she had just been told.

"Wow, Castle," she murmured, "that was pretty deep. What happened next?"

"Simple. I went back to school the next day and this time, I helped Neil. I apologized to him and he forgave me. We became friends and we remained that way until Mother and I had to move away again and our paths separated. Sometimes I wonder about what he's doing now."

"Well, wherever he is, I bet he never forgot about his friend. I'm really proud of you."

"I'm proud of you, too," he instantly replied, not missing a beat. She smiled at him.

"So, let me guess: you told me that story to make an analogy between me not wanting to forget about who I am and that whole 'look-at-yourself-in-the-mirror- thing?"

"Mrs. Castle, have I ever told you how much I love your brain?"

"Not today, Mr. Beckett."

"That is such poor behavior on my part. I shall correct that mistake," he proclaimed with a flourish as he pulled her against him until their lips were millimeters apart, "right now."

Even when they broke apart, Kate was happy to remain within her husband's embrace, even though the position they were in was not exactly the most comfortable one.  
>Eventually, though, it started to hurt and Castle rose to his feet, offering her his hand to help her up. She took it without a second's hesitation before she wrapped her arm around his waist as they walked together.<p>

"It's going to be Captain Beckett soon, then, isn't it?"

"Mm, most probably."

"I like the sound of it. Very sexy." He grinned in that special manner that told her he was about to say something inappropriate. "Can't wait to use it while we're -

"Castle!" She laughed, loud and inhibited, content to see that he was happy with her decision too. Whatever future was in store for them, she was looking forward to it.

She was, however, very surprised at Rick's lack of reference to the Simon Doyle case. Refusing to become a Senator meant she was changing Doyle's prediction and she had thought her husband would be all over it, warning her not to mess with the space-time continuum and –

"I am thinking of ending the Nikki Heat series soon."

"Oh, okay."

_Wait. What?_

She stopped dead in her tracks, forced him to stop with her. "I'm sorry, what did you just say?"

"I said I was thinking of ending the Nikki Heat series soon."

"…Why?"

"It's sort of difficult to explain but ever since I was awarded Poe's Pen and more importantly ever since we closed Holtzman's case…"

She swallowed thickly, still not over the fact that the psychiatrist had almost slit her husband's throat. That she had almost lost him again. She was not quite sure she would have survived it, that time. She forced herself to focus on what Castle was telling her.

"…I have felt lighter. Like a tiny part of the macabre, morbid thrill inside of me has faded away. I had not realized before how haunted I still was by that day in Hollander's Woods.  
>But now, I feel much more at peace."<p>

"Yes, I know the feeling." She told him with a smile, knowing he would have no problem to understand the subtext.

"I know you do. And just like you needed a new mountain to climb, I think I'd like to explore new horizons, as far as my writing is concerned."

"Well, I'm not sure about what your editor is going to say about that, but as your number one fan, I'm looking forward to reading it."

"Thank you."

As they resumed walking, children were still playing on the swings and their happy cries could be heard from afar. Kate briefly thought that maybe in not too long, she and Rick would bring their own little ones here.

Whatever the case, she promised herself she would make sure to hire Martha's help to teach them all about mirrors.


End file.
